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Current music:	The October Project - The October Project

The Proposal
OK, here it is - the proposal story. The reason it's taken so long for me to post this is that I wanted to make sure to call and e-mail all of my close friends and family personally; I didn't want them to read about my engagement online instead of hearing it directly from me. All those calls and e-mails made me realize how many people I truly love in this world. It's one of the greatest joys in my life; it's also really exhausting. All my friends I've told to call me "after Ren Fest" are calling me now to get together, and my datebook is filling up fast. Also, my relaxing Saturday with droid18 is already a distant memory; we have a recording session at 10:00 in the morning (top secret special surprise project), I need to get new strings for my guitar at Guitar Center, we need to get my ring sized (but that will be fun), we need to take droid18's suit to the cleaner's so he'll have it for Penny's wedding, and we need to go look at pacotelic's house to see if we want to rent it. Oh, and I need to put up fliers for my gig at Eddie's Attic next Thursday. After all of that, we can relax. Well, and do laundry. Having a washer and dryer actually at my house has made such a difference in my life that I don't think I could ever go back to having to spend an entire evening or afternoon at a laundromat.

OK, but so anyway...

droid18 knew he had a tough job cut out for him if he wanted to surprise me because we'd talked about it a lot. He is terrible at keeping secrets, and I am not so great at giving up control, so we had a lot of conversations about what his proposal would be like. I love proposal stories almost as much as I love weddings; I collect them. Wanna hear a couple of my favorites?

Scott proposed to Lauren while they were on vacation on Martha's Vineyard, a place that is very special to them. Everyone in the house (they were staying with the Thompsons) knew it was going to happen except for Lauren. Scott asked Lauren to go for a walk up to the lighthouse with him, and when they got to the lighthouse, he proposed, and she cried, and it was very romantic. They walked back to the house, and as soon as they got within sight of it, Lauren saw that everyone was out on the front porch waiting for them to get back, and as soon as everyone saw them, they broke out into cheers and yells. Isn't that a great story?

One of my favorites was the proposal story of Bea, from octave, whose boyfriend proposed to her at a romantic picnic for two that he'd planned. He'd found a place that will let you order fortune cookies with your own message inside. After they'd eaten, he gave her a fortune cookie, and when she opened it, it said, "Will you marry me?" She looked up at him, and he held out the ring. She said, "How did you get this in here???" He said, "Aren't you going to answer the question?" She said, "Yeah, sure, no problem, but - how did you get this in here???"

Probably my very favorite proposal story ever was Carl's. I don't even know Carl; my sister told me the story. OK, so his girlfriend had been waiting on the proposal for a while and was totally thinking it was coming any day. Carl had recently gotten into hippie drum circles; it was his new big thing. She wasn't really into it but knew he was really excited about it. One day, he asked her to meet him at the coffee shop where they'd had their first date, and she thought, "This is it!" After coffee, he said he had a surprise for her and asked her to close her eyes until he told her to open them. When she opened them, she saw... a drum. Sitting on the table in front of her. She hadn't realized that the coffee shop was right across the street from Carl's favorite drum shop. He said, "I got you a drum! I really want drum circles to be something we can do together, and I think you'll have more fun playing than listening. Do you like it?" She had been so excited for the proposal and was SO disappointed to get a stinking drum instead that she started to cry. Carl was all, "What's wrong? Don't you like it? It's a really nice drum. Here, tap it. It makes a really nice sound. Try it out." She couldn't stop crying. Then he said, "Turn it over and look inside; it's really well-made." When she turned it over, she saw that he'd taped her engagement ring to the inside. When she saw the ring, she started crying all over again. I love that story.

Anyway, back to my story, droid18 stepped up and planned the proposal of a lifetime. There's more drama, more cheese, and more humor in this proposal story than in any other that I've ever heard.

First of all, like I said, we'd talked about it a lot. The first time we talked about getting married, we'd only been dating for two months. It scared me so much, I almost broke up with him. We repeated this cycle several times; we'd talk about getting married, I'd get excited about it, I'd freak out, and then we'd fight. Finally, I told him, "Listen, this is moving too fast. I think we should be together at least a year before we do anything crazy. Let's have a couple of fights and go through some shit together and then see where we are." We made a deal that we wouldn't get engaged until after my sister's wedding, for two reasons: it was a year away, and I didn't want to take attention away from her big day by showing off an engagement ring of my own.

I knew droid18 was really excited to get engaged; like I said, he doesn't keep secrets very well. He told me the day my ring arrived in the mail. Once, when I was over at his place, he asked me if I would close my eyes and let him put the ring on my finger to make sure it fit. (I said no.) So I figured it was entirely possible that he would pull over on our way back to Atlanta from Lee's wedding and pop the question on the side of the road. But no, not my boy. He's way too romantic for that. Also, I knew he had some sort of grand gesture planned that involved all of my friends because he'd told me that much. (Given how much he loves to torture me with hints and the fact that he told literally everyone I knew about his plan, I'm amazed that I didn't find out about it ahead of time.)

A couple of weeks into the Renaissance Festival, I asked him whether he was planning to propose to me at Pub Sing. He laughed and said no. I said, "Oh, good. Because, you know, I wouldn't want to get engaged at Pub Sing." He said, "Why's that?" I said, "Well, I mean, on the one hand, it would be fun. All my friends would be there, and it would be cool, and everyone would toast us. But on the other hand, I don't think I'd be able to really enjoy it. I'd be working, you know? And plus, when I'm at the Ren Fest, I'm in character. I don't want to be in character when you propose to me. I want to be Lindsay, not Joni Minstrel." He said, "That's a very good point. I can see why you'd feel that way." I figured we had an understanding and didn't worry anymore about the possibility that he'd propose at Pub Sing.

I didn't realize that events had been set in motion long before that conversation. It turns out that droid18 had been planning my proposal since Halloween, when he'd talked to Caroline (the GARF entertainment director) at Jeff and Sarah's wedding.

So, finally, we arrive at the day of the event. It's the last day of Ren Fest, and I'm tired and really excited that it's the last day. I'm psyched for Pub Sing because it's the last one of the year, and there's always some surprise or nutty thing or weepy moment at the last Pub Sing (little did I know what this year's big moment would be). So, I'm on stage as Joni Minstrel, introducing the next act, which I thought was Loquacia Verbatim. Rivka interrupts me to say, "Actually, I think we need to do your song next." Dolph had told me backstage before Pub Sing that someone had requested that I play "The King's Been Caught," Joni's protest against the king's taxes. I thought that was really odd, since nobody ever requests that song. I play it a lot as it is, and most people would rather hear "Burn the Bodice" or "Give the Land Back to the Trolls" or "A Pair of Geese" - my big sing-along numbers. I said that to Dolph, and he said, "Well, it's some patron from out of state. I guess he heard it last time he was here and wanted to hear it again." (In retrospect, there were so many clues that something weird was going on, but I didn't put them all together.)

So, anyway, I'm all embarrassed to be interrupted in the middle of an introduction, thinking, "Jeez, she had to actually interrupt me for this? She couldn't just put me on after Rykie?" But I grab Dolph's guitar and launch into the song. I get through the first verse and chorus when, suddenly, in walks Danny Cook dressed as King Henry VIII!

Background: the year I created Joni Minstrel, our scenario was King Henry VIII, who was played by Danny Cook. The first time I kicked him, he was completely surprised, and it was only later that I realized I really should have asked his permission first. Ever after, he was my nemesis, and I, his. I constantly ran up to him and kicked him (or tried to, the year he finally got good bodyguards), I taught the patrons to make the sign of the RAM (Revolution Against Monarchs) whenever they saw him, and I wrote songs calling for his forcible removal from the throne. On Big Bit Day last year, I even had the entire pub audience throw spitballs at him. In return, he threatened to have me executed, sometimes walked into my sets with his arms crossed (I would suddenly switch to "Greensleeves"), and finally started claiming that he loved me and that I, secretly, loved him. I had fun protesting Prince John this year, but I have to admit that I really missed Danny. He was Joni Minstrel's whole raison d'etre.

So anyway, Danny walked into the pub and stopped my song with a big speech, and I was shocked, rooted to the spot. It hadn't yet occurred to me that this might be my proposal; I was certain that Danny had planned some elaborate prank to finally pay me back for all the kicks and insults lobbed at him over the years. Danny made this big speech in his booming voice that went something like, "Hold! HOLD! Too long have I been mocked by this minstrel! Too long have I been disrespected! And everywhere I go, I am greeted by the sign of the RAM!" (The audience promptly displayed the sign, to which he grumbled, "You're all a bunch of SHEEP!") He said, "GUARDS! Off with her head!" One of the beefeaters came up to get me, and I hid behind gypsyariana and Dolph. I still had no idea what on earth was going on, but I was excited to find out. I figured that whatever Danny had planned for me, it was going to be humiliating and terrible; I couldn't wait to see what the nefarious plan was that was worth him coming all the way out to the Ren Fest on the last day for, when I knew he had a performance of A Funny Thing Happened On the Way to the Forum to get to that night.

Then, I heard someone say, "Look! It's Robin Hood and his Merry Men!" I looked over, expecting to see Brian, who plays Robin Hood. Instead, it was droid18, dressed as Robin Hood, with The Lost Boys! The next thoughts that passed through my mind only took about a millisecond each. It went, "Is that - Derik???" followed by, "Wait a minute - Derik is in on Danny's prank?" followed by, "Ah, crap," as I realized that this was it and that he was proposing to me in the middle of Pub Sing, which we had specifically agreed that he would not do! (Did I mention that I have a problem with giving up control?)

So, anyway, the audience is cheering and freaking out, and it takes a while for him to get his lines out. (Can you believe he learned lines for this? How many people can say that their proposal required the learning of lines, the wearing of costumes, and a rehearsal?) He was shaking with nerves, which I think is what made me realize that he wasn't in on a prank on me but rather was about to propose to me. He said something like, "Unhand that minstrel! Her songs are of nothing but the truth!" Then there were some lines lifted directly from the song; Rivka said, "The other day, I left some pies to cool on the window, and the king stole them!" Someone else said, "Take the crown from his head, and he might as well be dead!" Dolph said, "Just another petty thief from Newca-a-a-stle" (imitating the way I sing it), at which point I almost completely lost it and started laughing uncontrollably. I managed to pull myself together, since, by this time, I knew this was a special occasion. droid18 had some more lines that I don't remember at all but which led to King Henry and his guard leaving the pub, at which point droid18 came to join me on the stage and said, "I would not ask anything..." and I said, "What can I give you in exchange for saving my life?" (Later he told me that I'd cut him off; his line was supposed to be, "I would not ask anything but that which you would freely give." But I didn't know, and at that point, I'd decided to just play along and make it as cheesy as possible.) He got down on one knee, opened the box with my pretty, pretty ring inside, and said, "Lindsay Smith, will you marry me?"

I think I said yes, but I don't remember. All I remember is seeing the ring and being so happy that he'd gotten that one. Why is it that, in the proposal stories I collect, almost no one says yes right away, and the people who do say yes, don't remember it later? It was this weird, out-of-body thing where I suddenly wasn't quite present. He kissed me, and everyone was cheering, and I wasn't really there. I was starting to freak out with everyone watching us; I didn't want us to be kissing in front of everybody. I wanted to collect myself, to pull myself together, but there wasn't time. Suddenly, everyone in the pub was coming up to me to hug me, congratulate me, and look at the ring, and Rivka was asking us to move outside the pub so that Pub Sing could continue. I think I might have been in shock. I didn't feel like I was shaking, but whenever I held out my hand to show someone the ring, I noticed that it was shaking. I was starting to freak out because it was Pub Sing and I was supposed to be helping to run it. If I'd been capable of rational thought by then, I'd have realized that of course Dolph and Rivka had it completely under control and had planned for me to be gone for the next few songs, but that's just not where I was, mentally. I started saying, "You guys, I have to go back inside. I'm working. I'm supposed to be working." I remember Maggie saying, "Oh, shut up!" and giving me a hug, then saying, "You're shaking." I remember Allison hugging me and crying and whispering something in my ear that I don't remember from that moment but that she e-mailed me later. The rest is all a blur.

After Pub Sing was over, I was back to normal. tempest_gypsy said, "Welcome to the club;" I'd known about her Memorial Day Pub Sing proposal in advance, and she'd known about mine. Cathy gave me some M&M's she'd had made in the Lost Boys colors with "show us the sign" printed on them. Suddenly, people were talking about where they were going to dinner, and I didn't feel capable of making a decision about that or doing anything, really, and I was so tired and drained that I felt like I was going to cry. droid18 carried my box to the car for me and then disappeared until I met up with him at the Chinese restaurant next to La Fi. When I got backstage and changed clothes and counted my tips, I felt better.

I saw Dolph and Rivka talking by their cars and went over to thank them and to apologize to Rivka for thinking she was pulling some weird control thing by making me sing my song next. She put her hands on her hips and said, "Sometimes, when people tell you to do things, there's a good reason!"

The rest of the night was the Chinese restaurant, followed by La Fi. I called my sister, but she wasn't home; I called my mother, but she wasn't home; I called my father and stepmother, and they were home, so they got to hear it first. I told them the whole story and then told them that we weren't in a hurry to start planning our wedding anything soon, to which Steph said, "Oh, good." We're still in ramp-down mode from Lee's wedding; I haven't even seen the pictures yet! While I was waiting for Mom and Lee to call back, Kenny called, and I told him the news.

Over the next two days, I found out that there were very few people in my life whom droid18 hadn't told about the proposal! I kept calling up friends and saying, "I'm engaged!!!" expecting them to scream and jump up and down, only to have them say, "I know! How did it go?" droid18 says he feels bad about that, but I understand. I would have done exactly the same thing in his position; I wouldn't have been able to stop myself! That kind of secret is way too exciting to keep to yourself, especially if you've been planning it for seven months. The people who did scream and jump up and down were Robin at work (most of my other co-workers knew about it because droid18 told them when he came to pick me up for the Lord of the Rings concert on Friday), my friend Ann in Chicago, anfie, and Cortney in D.C. Everybody else knew. (Well, some of the guys didn't, but guys generally don't scream and jump up and down when you tell them you're engaged.) My friend Lauren said she'd wanted to come out to the Ren Fest to see it but had been afraid her presence would have made me suspicious since the Ren Fest isn't really her thing. I told her, "You know, in retrospect, the fact that everyone I knew was there should have tipped me off, but I didn't think it was weird at all. I just figured it was 'cause it was the last day." I love the way everybody was so careful to keep me from finding out, even though I'm so self-absorbed and clueless that I never would have guessed it anyway. gypsyariana stayed for the first half of Pub Sing on Saturday, just so I wouldn't get suspicious when she did it on Sunday. Dolph came up with that elaborate "request" story. I rambled on and on at dinner on Friday about how I couldn't wait for my proposal and didn't know when it would be but knew it wouldn't be at Pub Sing, and Penny and karmakeys shifted uncomfortably and changed the subject. As soon as I started my song at Pub Sing, people started photographing and filming me, and I still didn't figure it out! I'm so dumb.

So that's the story. We're engaged.

The strangest part about it is that we got engaged in public, we went out to dinner with everyone we knew, we stopped by La Fi just long enough to say goodbye to people, we went home and went straight to bed, droid18 got up at 6:00 a.m. to go to work, and I didn't see him again until last night. All day Monday, the ring was my only proof that it had really happened.

He came over last night, and I cooked dinner. We decided to go for a walk, and as we were leaving the house, my favorite song by The October Project came on, and I asked him to dance with me. We started talking about the trip we've planned to go visit his parents in Indiana in July, and he said, "My dad's going to want to spoil you." I said, "I guess you get that from him, then." He smiled and said, "Yup." At that moment, it finally felt real. I kissed him, and the kiss was the most romantic, most passionate kiss I've ever experienced, and I thought, "I'm going to marry this man."

I'm getting married, y'all. I'm getting married!